Sooo...This happened over the summer.  And now I'm right back to where I was on the left photo.  This transformation took about 3 months.  Left was my rock bottom.  The heaviest weight I've ever been.  The worst I've ever felt about myself.  Until now.  Now I'm the heaviest I've ever been.  The worst I've ever felt about myself.  I avoid mirrors, getting my picture taken, and anything but yoga pants.  

On the right I felt strong, healthy, and confident.  I want those feelings back and I know I can do it if I put in the work.  I created this blog over a year ago as a way to keep myself accountable.  That didn't work out so well.  So I'm going to give it another shot and see what happens.

When those photos were taken I had started using Isagenix products, which I really like.  I will continue using them along with weight watchers (I have used this program before with success) and hitting the gym regularly.  Right now I am allotted 26 WW points+.  I find that doable when I am eating the right things and not eating empty points (such as 100 calorie packs that are 3-4 P+ but really aren't filling at all).  I also just joined a diet bet through Skinny Meg's blog.  You can check out her blog here.

I had never known what a diet bet was until she was talking about it on her blog.  Basically, you pay a certain amount of money (this one is $25) and you have 4 weeks to lose 4% of your weight.  The winners all split the pot!  It definitely seems like a fun way to stay motivated and you might even win some money at the end!  To join in the fun sign up here!

I'll be checking in with my progress, workouts, and what I'm eating.  I'll try to get a decent before picture that I'm not completely ashamed of putting on the internet for everyone to see in the next couple days!

All Time Low

Well, this weekend I hit an all time low.  I was all dressed up ready to go to my boyfriend's step sister's wedding.  I was feeling pretty good about how I looked.  I was texting with my NINE year old cousin, and sent her a picture of my boyfriend and I that we took all dressed up.  Her response was "you might want to toss that dress."  When I asked her why she said "because you kind of look big in it."  Wow.  Needless to say I had to fight back the tears.  Talk about some harsh truth!

I'm going home again this weekend to surprise my mom for her 50th birthday.  She thinks I'm not coming home since I was just home last weekend, so I can't wait to see her face when I show up at lunch with all her friends!!  It's only Tuesday and already this week has been crazy busy!  I woke up at 5am yesterday to make the drive back to Michigan so I could get back in time for class.  Then spent the night working on homework after class.  Today I had a day full of classes and homework as well.  Luckily I don't have class tomorrow so I can get some stuff done, unpack and repack, do a little cleaning in my apt, and get some assignments done.  I fly home on Thursday...luckily I'm flying instead of driving this time, turns a 9 hour trip in to about a 3 hour trip!!

Is it the weekend yet?!

Holy cow!! I am pooped! 12:37am and I just crawled in to my warm cozy bed. I think Tuesdays have officially become worse than Mondays. Tuesdays are my longest day of the week. I have class 9:30-1:45, then have a break during which I usually read the book that is due for my English class from 5-8:30. Yes, a 3.5 hour long English class. I almost didn't get up and go to my first class this morning. In fact, I had talked myself out of going, reset my alarm, and gotten cozy again when I started thinking about how I should really go, and then remembered we have a test in that class next week which ultimately meant I needed to get my ass up and go to class. So I did. Go me! It's the little accomplishments that add up!

Speaking of accomplishments, I got back my math midterm (which I was very nervous about seeing the grade) and got a B!! And I got back my history paper which I also was not very excited to see, and got an A!! So that definitely lifted my spirits. I somehow managed to get about 90% of my homework that needs to be done before this weekend completed which is a nice weight lifted off my shoulders.

I didn't work out today, in all honesty I did not have time, which is a horrible excuse but it really is true. I really do need to start just designating a time every day that fits in to my schedule so I have no other option but to go to the gym during that time. For breakfast I had a weight watchers blueberry muffin. I had a banana about an hour later. I didn't really eat lunch, I had some goldfish while reading my book. And for dinner I had left over spaghetti with meat sauce. I did have some treats in my English class - a pig in a blanket, cupcake, and 2 Oreos. All that food can't be in front of me or I will eat it just like I did! Out of sight out of mind works best for me! Oh well, the journey of weightloss is a marathon not a sprint right?!

It's off to la la land for me, another jam packed day tomorrow before heading back to Minnesota Thursday!! I can't wait!

Xoxo - Alli

Monday Muse

Does anybody else hate Mondays?  I just can't stand them.  I don't want to get out of bed, I don't want to do homework, I don't want to be productive at all.  And it's kind of strange because Sundays are my designated "be lazy" day, so you would think it would be all out of my system by the time Monday rolls around.  Anyways, enough about that.  I figured I would give a little bit of a background about myself.

I am 23 years old, and a junior at Western Michigan University in Kalamazoo, Michigan.  I started school here about 2.5 years ago.  I am majoring in Elementary Education.  I lived in Minnesota for about 6 years before coming to college in Michigan so my parents, most of my friends, and my boyfriend and puppy are all in Minnesota.  It's hard to be away from them but it's a good thing not to have as many distractions.  The nice thing is my grandparents live 10 minutes away from me so whenever I get home sick I just go over there and enjoy a nice home cooked meal!

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year and a half.  At the end of the summer we got a puppy together, a yellow lab, and named him Ace.  He is so cute and sweet and I miss him a lot when I'm at school.

I'm going home this weekend which always causes anxiety because I never eat very well when I'm home.  It seems like there is always a lot of eating out and getting quick bites to eat because we are always on the go having such little time.  Friday we have a wedding to go to, and that means lots of food, some drinks, and of course wedding cake.  I guess my willpower will have to be strong as ever.  Saturday night we are going to dinner with my best friend and her fiance (who is one of my boyfriend's best friend).  We are going to Fogo De Chao.  MmmMMMmmm it is delicious!!  Again, my willpower will be tested to make sure to not over-indulge.

One short weekend at home can completely undo all of the hard work I have done, and I am bound and determined to not let that happen anymore!!  So far today, for breakfast I had a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios and a banana.  I had a granola bar for a snack and some grapes.  I plan on making eggs(one whole, two whites) for dinner.  And most likely I will have carrots or cucumbers for a little evening snack.  I am really trying to get in the mind set of eating right, even if I haven't made it to the gym.  Food affects our body just as much as working out does.

I have also been drinking some Day Spa water that I found on pinterest.  Basically I thinly slice two apples, and put it in a half gallon of water with three small cinnamon sticks.  It is supposed to help boost metabolism.  I'm not sure if it really works, but either way I like the flavor it gives my water and I have found that I am drinking way more water than usual, which is something I have been trying to work on.

Well, it's time to get back to studying and fighting my urge to not be productive.  I have way too much to do before going home on Thursday to be lazy!!  I'll leave you with a few pictures...

Our sweet, sweet puppy, who is much bigger now! This was the first week he was home.

My amazing boyfriend and I at his best friends wedding

My family at my brother's high school graduation.  I love them more than anything!!

xoxo - Alli

Here Goes Nothing!

Well, I'm going to start my weight loss journey and I've decided to write about it.  I think writing about it will help keep me accountable (hopefully), and therefore help me be a little more successful.

As is true with most women, I have struggled with my weight and body image as long as I can remember.  I've never really thought of myself as fat or ugly, but I definitely have things that I want to change or improve on.  About 2.5 years ago things were rekindling with an ex boyfriend of mine, the man I thought was the love of my life and who I was going to marry.  That all stopped when he told me I had "let myself go".  Basically he told me I was too fat for him and he was not attracted to me.

This was devastating to me.  I sulked for about a week and then I decided that there may have been some truth in his statement.  Although he hurt me, he really helped me more than anyone could have.  I started working out every day and eating healthy.  Within four months I was down 20 pounds and man did I look good!  I felt great, I liked the way I looked, and I was happy.
Then I went home for the summer.  That meant not as much time to go to the gym, eating out with friends on a regular basis, and lots of drinking.  Gradually over the past two years all the hard work has gone down the drain and I have gained the weight back, plus some.

So my goal is to start working out at least five times a week, and eating healthy.  Once I get going to the gym into my routine the rest should come fairly easily.  I always each much healthier when I am working out.  I just have to get my ass to the gym.  And have self control when I go to the grocery store.  If I don't have junk food in my apartment then I don't think about it.  But when I see it at the store I sometimes have no willpower and end up with a bunch of crap food!
Hopefully there are people out there that can relate to what I'm going through and will join this journey with me!

I'll leave you with a few pictures...

These are all pictures from the summer after I lost the 20 pounds..looking and feeling pretty good!!

And some more recent ones.  I find that these days when I take pictures there is usually some editing or cropping that needs to be done before they are posted on any public forum.  Hopefully that will change soon!!